


I Said Something Wrong

by areyoufr



Category: SEVENTEEN - Fandom
Genre: College AU, Light Angst, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Minghao wants to apologize, Secret Relationship, They had a fight
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-07
Updated: 2019-01-07
Packaged: 2019-10-06 03:19:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17337614
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/areyoufr/pseuds/areyoufr
Summary: During the only time when their relationship is open to the public, Minghao ruins it, especially for Junhui.





	I Said Something Wrong

**Author's Note:**

> There is an apartment which resides 5 people, Minghao, Wonwoo, and Soonyoung included. 
> 
> Junhui (and Wonwoo) studies on another “branch” of the university that is nearby Minghao’s university. Only that it offers different kind of courses and programs.

"The Best Debater award goes to. . ."

 

_xu minghao!_

_xu minghao!_

_xu minghao!_

_xu minghao!_

 

The crowd repeated his name over and over again, but Minghao surprisingly wasn't too pleased. He bit his lip as he looked down. Honestly, did he do that well? Everyone did so great in the debate, though, so why pick him?

 

Besides, the debate's over. Now he had enough time to think about how to talk to Junhui —

 

". . . Xu Minghao."

 

Minghao certainly didn't expect such support. The crowd roared in applause and cheers. Did he really deserve it that much? Damn it. He told himself to make it fast in order to catch up with his boyfriend later on. Though he knew that would be next to impossible considering he had just won against his boyfriend in debate.

 

_What the hell, he didn’t even deserve it. If only he hadn’t interrupted Junhui’s studying last night. . ._

 

With a forced, polite smile, he walked across the stage to receive the award, sparing his boyfriend a short glance — he was only clapping. Smiling. Like last night never happened.

 

From the past five years that they knew each other, and the one year that they dated, Junhui wasn't one to fully express emotions. Last night, however, was an exception. He visited Minghao's shared apartment for a project with Wonwoo, and amidst the scattered papers for both research and debate, Minghao had the fucking nerve to insult him in Mandarin for something that he lacked, but for something that Minghao himself didn't.

 

"You're just a pretty boy, Junhui," Minghao had said that night, clearly distressed. "Where in ‘nobody fucking knows what you’re talking about’ can you  _not_ understand? Can you please stop acting like a five-year-old with a premature brain because _none_ of us can fucking help you, okay? None of us are taking the same subjects as you do. You picked that subject, you _suffer_ with it!" 

 

All four of his roommates were there — and, and fuck, remembering how Junhui's eyes had gotten slightly bigger, the way he dropped his papers, the way he stuttered when he first talked back, the way the tears pooled in the corner of his eyes, way he raised his voice when he argued, and the way he calmly packed his things and bid goodbye — Minghao felt like a complete asshole.

 

"W-wha. . ." Minghao couldn't get that image out of his head. "Hao, I get that you’re stressed, and, but. . ."

 

"But what? You're doing two things at the same time? Research papers and debate?"

 

"If you think I'm trying to appeal to you for pity, I’m not."

 

"You could just refuse the job if you can’t do it! You know you're busy with part-time jobs and agriculture stuff, so why be the replacement for debate? And now you’re whining because you can't do it?"

 

And that is precisely why he didn't deserve this Best Debater award. The fight last night must have distracted Junhui. 

 

(Minghao still continued to put up a grateful facade, with the award and all, though he didn’t really care about the award that much.)

 

The apartment was dead silent after so, since no one really saw Minghao and Junhui openly give each other affection, much less fight with each other, though they understood nothing unless they knew Mandarin.

 

In everyone's eyes, Minghao was 'rumored' to be this 5-year-old pretty boy's crush, when they have been literally dating for a year. Junhui's so much more than that; so much more than just the pretty boy with the brain of a 5-year old, but Minghao had slipped up last night and told him that he was exactly this — a good-for-nothing, pretty boy, with a premature brain.

 

Junhui literally sacrificed his social image to be reduced to the admirer of Xu Minghao, while everybody who knew Minghao saw him as a future lawyer who'd kick asses in court one day. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

 

He fucked up so bad, and that was the only thing in his mind as he packed up.

 

Junhui was turning away now, laptop on one arm, and he was almost leaving with his teammates. Minghao wanted to talk to him, so, so bad, but before he could walk, one of his teammates of 3 pulled him away.

 

"Should we celebrate?" One of Minghao's teammates in debate asked. "We won the debate after all."

 

Minghao tried to join the conversation, and finally, they made plans on Friday before separating from each other, and onto their next class schedules. He checked his satchel first if he had his spare clothes with him, sighing in relief when there is so, and checked the time. 

 

He had a a few minutes left before class. 

 

"-congrats, Minghao," Soonyoung told him as he was about to exit. "I know you're going to be a good lawyer someday."

 

"Wow, where did you come from?"

 

Soonyoung smirked. "You have class? Good luck to your brain."

 

"Stop complimenting me, hyung. But thanks, though. I have to hurry."

 

Did he really do that well?

 

 

-

 

 

There was no change in the atmosphere of the shared apartment, to which Minghao was thankful for. It was still messy and chaotic, especially during midnight. 

 

Nobody spoke of the argument with Junhui, even Wonwoo, which he appreciated. 

 

Minghao has work from 12 to 3 AM in the morning in a 24-hour convenience store. He mutters jargons under his breath for the exam he predicted is going to happen the next morning, as he prepared to leave for work. He slipped in his notes inside of his bag, and when he stepped out of his room, he saw Soonyoung and their other two roommates arguing about some political movement. 

 

He realized it’s been a while since he had been updated with political news. Because he had no idea what they were talking about. 

 

One of his roommates, who was sprawled on the floor, kicks Minghao and catches the latter’s attention. "Good luck on work today. Thank goodness I'm a Youtuber."

 

The other roommate raised a bottle of — what the hell is that green thing? — and began to sing the national anthem. "To patriotism, losers!"

 

"What are you talking about?! I thought the topic was tax?"

 

"What? Which country are we talking about?"

 

Soonyoung suddenly cursed out loud. "I just remembered I have some revisions to do! Turn off the music, I need to concentrate. No one disturb me."

 

Minghao abandoned his roommates — or apartment-mates, rather — and headed straight to the convenience store, which took ten minutes of his time. 

 

Nothing has changed to his schedule, at least. 

 

Maybe only thing that changed was that Junhui won’t be arriving in the convenience store for a late night snack, and that worried Minghao to the bone. How was Junhui supposed to keep himself awake after his part-time at the restaurant, when he’s going to study? 

 

And Minghao was right. 

 

All throughout dawn, Minghao’s only companion was his notes and and a few customers. And if it counts, guilt is his companion, too. 

 

 

-

 

 

It had been a week since they fought, and Junhui wasn't going in the apartment anymore to complete his project with Wonwoo. Instead, they have been meeting in Junhui's apartment, or maybe even their university's study buildings (Minghao saw them two days ago).

 

Minghao didn't expect it to go this far, with two people completely adjusting for the wrong words Minghao voiced out. In an attempt to make things right, he had been texting Junhui since the debate.

 

_Jun, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that._

 

_Can we talk? I’ll let you decide when and where can we meet, then I’ll check my schedule so it could be arranged_

 

_Hi Jun. Don't forget to eat properly._

 

_Good luck on whatever you're going to do today! :-) I hope your hard work pays off_

 

_Hi Jun, don’t waste your day-off by staying up. Get some rest, please._

 

Junhui's replies had been so short, and sometimes, he doesn’t even reply.

 

Minghao can't help but feel bad again. He wasn't just scared for their relationship, but he was worried about Junhui as well, who was most likely not taking care of himself well. Again.

 

But he pushed those thoughts at the back of his mind and prepared for his midnight shift at the convenience store. When he stepped outside of his dorm room, his Youtuber roommate was doing an ASMR video. 

 

The roommate told Minghao to be quiet, and the latter obeyed. Minghao wished his emotions could be as obedient, too. 

 

 

-

 

 

"Stop staring at the painting, Hao."

 

Minghao regained his senses once he heard Soonyoung's voice next to him. Clutching the strap of his bag, he asked, "how long have I been here, hyung?"

 

"Long enough for me to tell you have something on your mind. What's up?"

 

"I haven't seen Junhui yet, hyung."

 

"This isn't his building," Soonyoung said carefully, "you know that, right?"

 

"Yes, but I was kind of looking for inspiration on how I'll apologize."

 

Soonyoung almost laughed. "Inspiration on how you'll give your apology? Hao, just talk to him and apologize. You can build the biggest sculpture but if it lacks total sincerity, it's completely useless."

 

Talk to him, that's what Soonyoung is pointing out. A few days ago, that was what Minghao wanted to do. Right now, it seemed like a scary thought. He was feeling shameful of himself to even show himself.

 

Soonyoung must have read the look on his face. "If you can't face him then just write him a letter telling him you're sorry and that you guys will meet up. That way, you already apologized, but you're also giving an opportunity for the both of you to talk."

 

Minghao was considering it. He thanked Soonyoung, who simply smiled and went back inside the art room. The younger headed back to his own building, mentally preparing himself for a tedious lecture, and possibly a surprise quiz. 

 

 

-

 

 

When it was his vacant period, he wrote Junhui a letter. (He was thankful his mind was still working after a tedious lecture, too.)

 

_I'm sorry for being an asshole. If you're feeling tired, get some rest. If you're hungry, eat properly. I know university stuff and your part-time jobs may be weighing pressure on you, especially now that I've treated you like trash. I love you. Please stay safe._

 

He definitely cannot face Junhui. Not right now, at least.

 

After his classes, he made his way towards Junhui's building. He mentally reminded himself of Junhui's schedule — he had class that was about to end in a few minutes.

 

 _Few minutes. Crap._ Minghao killed the time in the bathroom by attempting to change his appearance in order not to be recognizeable. _Fucking coward_ , he told himself, before finally leaving the bathroom. _You shameful piece of shit._

 

Once the door of Junhui's classroom opened, students filed out and voices from chitchats rose from here and there. _Here goes nothing_. 

 

Minghao quickly spotted his boyfriend.

 

With his head down, he walked towards him, slipping the letter inside one of the bag's pockets. Hopefully, hopefully, hopefully, he'll read it.

 

 

-

 

 

Minghao hadn't seen Junhui for the past three days, and he hasn't been answering his calls. It's a given that they won't see each other, anyway, since Junhui studies at the other branch of the university, a lower-class one at that not to mention, but still provides the same, good quality of education. Sort of.

 

And Minghao shouldn't really fucking judge.

 

After his shift ended at the convenience store, which was at 3 AM, he headed back to the apartment house to see his Wonwoo-hyung, now ready for bed, who had been really busy recently — for studies, extracurriculars, and his boyfriend too.

 

He mentally told himself here's his chance.

 

"Wonwoo-hyung," Minghao called out. "How are you? You seem tired."

 

Wonwoo chuckled, holding on to his room's doorknob. "I know you're going to ask me about Jun."

 

Oh. "I mean, I care about you too."

 

"I'm fine." He waved a dismissive hand. "Junhui's, well, I don't think I should be telling you this, but to my surprise, Jun seems to be stressing out so much lately."

 

"He is?"

 

"Yeah."

 

"Why?"

 

"It's not my place to tell."

 

"Can you at least tell me how he's been stressing himself?"

 

"Talk to him yourself, Hao."

 

"He's not answering my messages and calls," Minghao said tiredly, rubbing his temple. "I'm worried about him, and I never saw him recently. I don't want to disturb him in his job, either. I placed a letter in his bag, but I was never returned a message back."

 

Wonwoo seemed to think carefully for a moment.

 

"I helped you since the—"

 

"Alright, alright," Wonwoo said, defeated. "Don't tell anyone what I told you, and don't tell him I told you this," his voice lowered to a whisper, Minghao had to be near him, "his debate teammates had been bothering him about you, saying things like, you should be like your crush, Xu Minghao, he's excellent at debate, and he's younger than you. I saw it happen twice, too. There are also some girls in the study building that were crushing on you, too, when you went there last week. Just yesterday he was crying during our project —" _what?_ "—I found him crying but it wasn't meant for me to see." _It was first time_. "He told me that he was crying because he feels so inferior to you, and that he feels like an asshole for ignoring you and your texts."

 

Minghao felt his world crumble around him. But there was no time for pity parties. He had to think of a solution, fast, while Wonwoo is here.

 

"Talk to him, okay?"

 

 _Think fast_.

 

"Are you done with your project, hyung?" Minghao asked slowly. Wonwoo shook his head no. "Okay, then, is it alright if you come back here to finish it? If he refuses, tell him I'm not going to be here."

 

Wonwoo grinned. "You know, before all of this, the both of you lied low so brilliantly. Everyone thinks your relationship is a rumor because you guys never interact so much — that you'll always be annoyed or ignoring him, and he'd pine so much for you. But that isn't the case. I feel honored to be part of those who know exactly what's happening."

 

Minghao rolled his eyes playfully. "You're the only one, actually. But don't flatter yourself. Goodnight, hyung."

 

 

-

 

 

From the other side of the door while Minghao was preparing himself to go to work, he heard the familiar footsteps and voice of Wonwoo and Junhui.

 

The latter had exhaustion lacing his steps, and Minghao wanted to hug him tighly so, so badly, because he knew the other had a tiring day — university, projects, part-time job 1 at a restaurant, and part-time job 2 at 5 AM in the coffee shop.

 

It was nearing midnight. He wondered how Junhui would even sleep.

 

_"We're just going to print this out Wonu and it would finally be over!!!!"_

 

 _"My roommates are all busy with some party. But don't get too excited,"_ he heardWonwoo reply. "And we have to add more stuff, Jun."

 

_"Yeah, but for the last part ONLY!"_

 

He also wondered where Junhui gets his energy after a busy, tedious day.

 

Minghao slipped his notebook in his bag so he could study at the convenience store. His shift isn't until 12, and it was a ten-minute walk.

 

He ran a hand through his mullet, mentally preparing himself to see Junhui in person, and probably talk to him, while also for the shift ahead.

 

All of Minghao's rationalization had been thrown away once he stepped out of the door. There Junhui was, standing by the dinner table, with his back to Minghao. Wonwoo quickly caught his eye, and from Wonwoo's small nod, Minghao knew he should take this chance.

 

Without a warning, he ran up to him and hugged him tightly, earning a shocked hiss from the elder boy, who smelled so much like food. _Restaurant duties_. Minghao heard Wonwoo say he'll handle the printer, before walking away.

 

"I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry, Jun." He rested his head on his boyfriend's neck. "I shouldn't have said that. You're more than just a pretty boy and I know you're intelligent. You're very hardworking, open-minded, and a total peacemaker, while I'm none of those things. I hope you read my letter and actually took care of yourself. I'm really, really sorry for being such an idiot. I feel bad. And I know you do too, but you don't deserve it."

 

Junhui didn't respond. He remained standing still, too.

 

"Jun? Are you still mad? I'm sorry."

 

Junhui was still quiet and unmoving.

 

"Junnie, say something, please." Minghao raised his head. "How can I make up to you?"

 

". . .nothing," Junhui said quietly, and Minghao inwardly panicked. His boyfriend was rarely serious. Quiet, but not that serious.

 

"What? Are you sure?"

 

Junhui hummed. "It's fine. Just stop degrading yourself when you compliment me. You know you're better."

 

Minghao remembered their fight. "You're still angry."

 

Junhui finally chuckled. "I'm not! I'm just saying the truth."

 

He was then reminded of his previous conversation with Wonwoo, about Wonwoo's narration in particular. He decided it would be better if he pushed the topic aside. They could talk about it for another time.

 

"The truth? Do you know what the truth is?"

 

"That you're better than me? It's not a joke, Hao. Everyone knows it. Everyone sees it."

 

Minghao predicted this would go on another fight, but not as serious as the first one. "I'm really sorry. You must be so tired, though you won't admit it. Did you eat already? Did you get enough sleep? Bitch I was so worried about you—" The taller laughed.

 

"Congratulations, by the way—"

 

"Fuck that." _I don't deserve the award_.

 

He reached out to the taller, his heels raising slightly, for a better angle to kiss his cheek. "I'm really sorry for being so insensitive. You don't deserve it. Get some rest after the project, okay? If you can't go home at dawn, you know you can always stay at my room and wear my clothes and use my things."

 

Junhui suddenly removed Minghao's arms from him, which scared the younger. _This was it._ His mind was almost going to panic — if it weren't for Junhui placing his hands on Minghao's waist instead and pulling him in for a kiss.

 

It lasted only for a few seconds, though, but it was enough to make Minghao shudder and feel so much happiness. It was both longing but content — Minghao wondered how Junhui even does this. Either he was brilliant at expressing his emotions or Minghao just words everything out.

 

When they both pulled away, Minghao ruffled Junhui's hair and held his jaw, leaving small kisses on his boyfriend's face, and kissing him softly on the lips before he finally finished.

 

It was worrying to see Junhui's face up-close like this. He looked so tired and in need of sleep. "I don't deserve this kind of affection from you," they both heard Minghao's voice shake, "but thank you, thank you so much. You've done so much more than what's asked of you."

 

Junhui just smiled, and it was one of those smiles that lacked childishness. He looked his age, if not, a little bit wiser. He smiles like he understands, like was content.

 

Minghao rarely saw it, but here it was now. He kissed the taller again, this time, on the neck.

 

"Good luck on work today, baby." He kissed Minghao's nose, while his fingers played slightly with Minghao's shirt. "Don't tire yourself too much. I know you're headed towards something big, but please don't sacrifice your health for it. I'll see you at 3 AM if I'm still awake."

 

"No." The younger pulled away completely. "I'll see you later after my exams. Get some fucking rest. I'll cuddle you when I get home, if you’re still here."

 

"I'm looking forward to it."

 

And Minghao left, feeling lighter than before.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> And when Minghao arrives back home, he finds his part of the apartment occupied by Junhui. He feels exhaustion radiate away from him, replaced by content.


End file.
